Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Late night super fast musings

I always forget what I want to talk about on here if I don't write it down right away. I've have a few great ideas over break....and then promptly forgot them. I had a thought while I was at work today though, stemmed partly from Twilight (great books....movies are very close to them which makes me happy). In this one scene Bella (the main character/damsel in distress) and Edward (main vampire character who saves Bella every 5 seconds) were talking and he says to Bella, something along the lines of you don't see yourself clearly. Of course, the boy is blinded by love but that phrase still sent my brain wandering (work is boring and very condusive to brain wanderings). Everyone has a skewed view of themselves, no one sees themselves clearly. And I began to wonder how/where my view of myself is skewed and what other people actually see in me. I am a fairly quiet and shy person (probably viewed by those who don't know me as downright anti-socialness) unless you put me in a room with a bunch of my friends, I don't talk unless I have something to add to a conversation, I love to dance but don't do it often (do it rarely would be more accurate), nor do I have any strong desire to work REALLY hard at making myself up and looking amazing (I don't dress to impress just anyone....if I do it, it is to impress a specific someone now and again) I am a submissive by nature and cringe at leadership type things. I am comfortable with how I am. It has been pointed out to me that this combination of traits shows itself as low confidence (yes I have a hard time beliving I am pretty, what girl doesn't? Blame society!). Yes, this is what I think about when I file papers....among other things.

What do others see when they see/know you? (not what you think they see, what do they REALLY see?) In ways that is more you the the warped bendy carnival mirror we look at ourselves through (only look through the eyes of people you know for this or you might see yourself worse then you already do)

By next week I should be back to regular schedule with a few post schedule modifications

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