Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Here it is from the begining

I figured since this is the talk about pagan stuff day I would talk about how I became pagan and go from thier with my specific beliefs and so on and so forth (it will take up more then one post don't worry)

It started waaaay back when I was in grade school, 8th grade a friend of mine had been talking about a whitchcraft book she had found (let me tell you it was not a good one) so being curious I went online and did some reading and holy shit it was love at first sight. My Catholic upbringing had never felt right, at that age I couldn't put it into words it just didn't work for me. But reading what I did about Wicca was like coming home, lots of pagans say that but its true. I was reading and literally out loud said "thats it, thats what I want" the basic beliefs were already mine. So like every child who knows thier parents won't approve I snuck around and learned what I could while they weren't at home. In high school I found one of my really good friends (still friends with him) who I introduced to Wicca and we did alot of learning together. It made it more fun in a way because we would come to school and talk about what we had read or found, share things we printed out. Maybe it was the fact that I wasn't alone in it all. In the middle of High school we came out of the broom closet as it were to our friends gaining another to the group of pagan students. This is around when I bought my first book Idiots guide to wicca and witchcraft. Its silly now thinking about buying that book when really I should have gotten a Scott Cunningham or Gerald Gardner book but I didn't know enough to know that I didn't know anything. All three of us swapped the book between eachother reading and learning and such. We tried to do a spell to make the norther nights appear one Halloween, I'm not even sure if we were aware that it was Samhain that night. Exactly a year later (depending on who you ask it was our fault or someone else's) the northern lights were in our sky. It was amazing. Then we went to college still in the area but all of us too busy to really see eachother much. I stopped studying for a number of reasons (I was still Wiccan) my fellows weren't around to talk to about it, I had more class work then I could ever have imagined so everything just fell to the wayside until I was given this book (by one of my high school pagan friends) called the Circle Within (amazing book) written by Dianne Sylvan. It took me 2 years to read through the whole thing and remember what I read because I would read it in such short snippets. Then 2 summers ago I got back into contact with my first pagan friend who had a boyfriend who was also pagan (they are so cute together) I ended up hanging out alot at thier house (almost every night) and took up the learning again cause that boyfriend knows a hellova ton, by this time I had finnished reading The Circle Within. We (me and the boys) talked about making a never really got off the ground but it was a beautiful thing. The next school year came up and I moved into an apt with a friend of mine (the lady runs the Living Like a Goddess blog) and she expressed interest in paganism and then she and I and the boys (who I spent most of that summer with) would celebrate the special days (those of us who could come out). My roomate and I would do tarot readings together and damn were we good at it. Which leads me to here, blogging about stuff. Oh! almost forgot the most important thing, I came out of the broom closet to my family which started a whole new interesting-ness which I have already written about. Now and then I consider becoming a pagan....minister (whatever you want to call it). Who knows maybe I'll do it.

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